Tallyrand

The Tallyrand. Sounds like a euphemism that your grandfather may have muttered in reference to his penis, doesn't it? Well, lucky for us it's not. Because that's where we ate last week.
If you're a Burbank luncher, I'm sure you've seen it lurking on Olive, near Verdugo, with its silly-fonted signage. It's been tempting me with the promise of potential weirdness ever since I first started working up here; and now I'm glad we went, because it sure did deliver...
Now, first things first, this place is another "family style" diner. Given our recent lunching at Lancers, I was none too impressed when I discovered this. I've since been convinced that family style diners excel at only one thing. Mediocrity. Alas, we went in anyway...
Walking in, we were greeted enthusiastically by Marty.


Towering over us at around 6 feet tall (well, towering over ME, because Alissa is shenormous too), Marty unleashed a well-rehearsed rapid-fire string of sounds & words welcoming us to the Tallyrand. She waited patiently (though, clearly, with ants in her pants) while we wandered about the restaurant taking in the sites & deciding where to sit. See, there are 3 seating areas here:
the diner side, which looked like a typical diner...

the bar, which looked AWESOME...

and a 3rd area on the other side which was closed so received zero of our attention.

After much deliberation, we chose the diner because it was nice & light and didn't make me feel like I needed to order a bourbon with my lunch.


While seating us, Marty mentioned that Alissa & I were just too cute & asked our birthdays. She went on to very excitedly explain that Capricorns & Virgos are always wonderful couples. And did she mention that we were just too cute? Well, unfortunately for Alissa, Marty had incorrectly labeled me a Virgo. I am, in fact, a Libra; and everyone knows that Libras & Capricorns are a wholly unholy alliance...

The Basics:It's a family sort of place with a family sort of fare. Soups, salads, sandwiches, and fried things aplenty. You're sure to find something to suit your lunch here. Huell Howser recommends the Hot Turkey Sandwich, though, and Marty will tell you all about it.


Alissa: After getting adjusted to the fact that we were going to not only be fed, but entertained, Cory and I examined the menu for anything that could be called a "specialty" and found that there was a powerful core group that they recommended. We sorted out which we felt needed to be in our mouths, and I came up with the fried chicken. Also, having in NO WAY learned from my past food endeavors, I ordered a root beer float. Cause it was on the menu. And I was like- yeah- I clearly want that.


I am a horrible food-taster, apparently, because I did not remember to retain the flavor of the chicken. It was moist- I remember that. But all is overshadowed by the skin. It was not so much a flaky crispy skin, as it was a shell that literally snapped in your teeth it was so crunchy. It was the kind of texture I find dangerous- as I will eat way more than I need just to feel that snap again. In fact. I wish I could bite dat right now. Dang. Anyhow it is good... in that it is unique and fun. It must taste good too, as I think I would have remembered bad or incredible. Fries came with this at Marty's suggestion because we were already gettin mashed taters with Cory's choice. Steak fries. Not under or overcooked. Just right.


I definitely should not have gotten the root beer float- but I am not complaining. It was good & satisfied my yearly float craving. Cory & I tasted each others' dishes as well- and I really liked eating a sandwich (which he will describe below) with a knife and fork. I don't know if I have ever done that. It made me dream of Thanksgiving and that ol' fashion "I ate too much and I feel like I might vomit and everything will just look like stuffing" feeling. I assume this is the way you describe food to others to make it seem appetizing. Please let me know if I am wrong.


Cory:Walking in, I was like, "Awww, crap...it's another Lancers," but it really did prove to be quite the opposite. While it's essentially the same type of place, everything about it is just...better. The vibe is cool, the bar is silly (and the pic we have of it doesn't really do it justice), the food is good, and the staff is, well...quite possibly insane.


After the welcoming song & dance from the very gracious & highly caffeinated Marty, I decided to order the much-lauded-on-public-television Hot Turkey Sandwich. I haven't actually seen one of these on a menu since I was a wee lad in Iowa & would frequent the strange little diner attached to the Woolworth store in our small-town mall. I used to love these things & was very happy to have the chance to order one again. When it arrived, it looked EXACTLY as I remembered from my youth. A heap of mashed potatoes between two halves of a plain white bread turkey sandwich, all smothered in a snot-colored gravy. This version included a side of stuffing & cranberry sauce too, which gave the meal more of a white trash Thanksgiving feel. Thankfully, I'm a lover of all foods white trash. Hot turkey sandwiches, chipped beef, tater tots, or anything containing Velveeta - put em on a table in front of me & I'll happily put it in my facehole.


Perhaps it was just my sense of nostalgia, but this sandwich really delivered for me. The turkey was juicy & flavorful, the potatoes had the perfect consistency, and the plain ol' white bread was utterly saturated with gravy. Every bite took me back to that weird little diner in Iowa and, while I can see why the appearance may scare some people away, I think everyone should try this at least once.
I also nibbled some bits of Alissa's fried chicken. It was pretty good. Crispity crunchity...just the way I like my chickens. bock bock.

Good bite? Or just totally bites?
A: Good bite. Snap. Crunch. I don't know if Marty's always there- but I cannot imagine what it would be like without her. Probably less rapping.

C: It's a good bite. Actually, the overall experience beats the bite; but the experience makes the bite worth biting. Be prepared for aural overload.






Info:
1700 West Olive Avenue
Burbank, California 91506
(818) 846-9904
Open Daily 6am-10pm

**Our reports are based on one visit/meal- so we're far from experts on these joints! so if you have advice or experiences you'd like to share, please feel free to enlighten us & our readers! Our goal is to give enough info that someone might feel okay trying somewhere new (or know to avoid it!). Thanks for reading :)